Parents: How do/did you get your toddlers to stay in bed at night?

[Chordata]

Originally Posted by Purplegrasshopper

I don't believe in drugging your kids or locking them in a room. That is borderline child abuse imo.

To the OP: You mentioned she keeps coming out of the room. Well, keep putting her back. Who cares that it takes hours. Being a parent is not easy. It's about consistency and a battle of will power. The second you give in, you've taught them the wrong lesson. Sooner or later, the child will learn that when you put her in bed, she needs to stay there. Your daughter is testing you, nothing more. Don't get lazy; keep putting her back in the bed, no matter how many times she gets up and comes out and no matter how long she does it for.

While that seems like a good idea in a perfect world, that does not work for us. We have another baby in the house, and the 3-year old's crying and screaming while we try to walk her back to her room inevitably wakes up the baby. Which leads to more issues.

How is locking a door child abuse?

Originally Posted by DetroitSportsFan

My in-laws have some of those at their house, and it looks like I'm going to have to invest in these at our house. They work well.

We've tried 3 different kinds, and my 3-year old has managed to disassemble all of them within minutes. LOL. Hope yours work better.

[jw]

Originally Posted by Another_Dude

I think that as a parent you just have to be creative. Every child is different and what works for one may not work for another. It is important that your child understands that you love them, but they have to stay in their place because its the right thing to do.

poor kid

[Purplegrasshopper]

Originally Posted by O_V_N

While that seems like a good idea in a perfect world, that does not work for us. We have another baby in the house, and the 3-year old's crying and screaming while we try to walk her back to her room inevitably wakes up the baby. Which leads to more issues.

You're using the other baby as an excuse not to properly parent your 3-year old. And my "idea" is the correct method. Ask any child psychologist. But I wish you the best. And remember, the world is what we make of it, perfect or otherwise. Good day, my friend.

[Chordata]

Originally Posted by Purplegrasshopper

You're using the other baby as an excuse not to properly parent your 3-year old. And my "idea" is the correct method. Ask any child psychologist. But I wish you the best. And remember, the world is what we make of it, perfect or otherwise. Good day, my friend.

No friend of mine would accuse me of not properly parenting my children. Put me on your ignore list please.

[Beta Man]

Our son will move to the "Big-Boy" bed in 3 months, when the new baby arrive.... it'll be right at my son's 2nd B-Day, so I'm sure it'll be a little early for him to be in bed he can get out of........

Either way... I'm enjoying the various ideas on this..... So far Teabaggin's seems to be the most fool-proof though

Our issue, is the fact that his, and our bedrooms are on the 2nd floor, and the stairs are about 5' wide, so we need to find a gate that will fit it.... but still be easy to open/close ...... once that is done, we'll probably close the other bedroom doors, leave ours, the new baby's, and his open..... and just hope he gets used to going to sleep.... if not, we'll start to look into keeping him in his own room.....

[Bizdady]

Originally Posted by Beta Man

Our son will move to the "Big-Boy" bed in 3 months, when the new baby arrive.... it'll be right at my son's 2nd B-Day, so I'm sure it'll be a little early for him to be in bed he can get out of........

Either way... I'm enjoying the various ideas on this..... So far Teabaggin's seems to be the most fool-proof though

Our issue, is the fact that his, and our bedrooms are on the 2nd floor, and the stairs are about 5' wide, so we need to find a gate that will fit it.... but still be easy to open/close ...... once that is done, we'll probably close the other bedroom doors, leave ours, the new baby's, and his open..... and just hope he gets used to going to sleep.... if not, we'll start to look into keeping him in his own room.....

We just found out that we are expecting another as well! So our 16 month old will be around 2yrs also when the new baby comes. Dont you just look forward to all the crazyness!?? lol

[Chordata]

We're all in the same boat. Mine was 2 when the second one came, as well. That's why she got booted out of her crib and into her new room and bed. She did exceptionally well -- until recently.

[Moefiz]

I have twin boys so for them staying in there room is not a problem, they have each other too keep them company they still have to have a night light on in there room and one in the hallway...

My problem is that one get up early and wake the other one up, so basically both of them are up at 6am..and as usual they wake the rest of the house up..

As for the OP question I would have to say use a nightlight and have her keep something she is comfortable with...teddy,doll..her favorite Blu or your favorite blu...

[Bizdady]

Originally Posted by Moefiz

I have twin boys so for them staying in there room is not a problem, they have each other too keep them company they still have to have a night light on in there room and one in the hallway...

My problem is that one get up early and wake the other one up, so basically both of them are up at 6am..and as usual they wake the rest of the house up..

As for the OP question I would have to say use a nightlight and have her keep something she is comfortable with...teddy,doll..her favorite Blu or your favorite blu...

Thats why Im glad we are having another so soon. At first I wasnt too stoked but its nice to have them close together so they have each other to play with. Im a twin so it was always nice having a partner in crime.

[Beta Man]

Originally Posted by Bizdady

We just found out that we are expecting another as well! So our 16 month old will be around 2yrs also when the new baby comes. Dont you just look forward to all the crazyness!?? lol

yeah

Really, our first one is an absolute angel, and he's great when it comes to behaving, not crying, taking naps and going to bed with zero fight (he just lays there awake, until he falls asleep ) Everyone warns us that the next one will make up for the easy time we've had with him!!!!! (of course the next one is gonna be a girl )

[Bizdady]

Originally Posted by Beta Man

yeah

Really, our first one is an absolute angel, and he's great when it comes to behaving, not crying, taking naps and going to bed with zero fight (he just lays there awake, until he falls asleep ) Everyone warns us that the next one will make up for the easy time we've had with him!!!!! (of course the next one is gonna be a girl )

LOL Mine is a devil. he climbs up anywhere he can get a foot on, fights with his sister all the time pulling her hair and biting, not to mention he doesnt respect the HT! I found toys, pens and who else knows what inside my subwoofer when I saw this throw my wireless mouse in there LoL he takes after me

[pokefan]

Originally Posted by Beta Man

Our issue, is the fact that his, and our bedrooms are on the 2nd floor, and the stairs are about 5' wide, so we need to find a gate that will fit it.... but still be easy to open/close ......

You need one like THIS.

[DarkDune]

Originally Posted by DarkDune

Here is an image:



Known for keeping their interests in their own room

Oh yeah, BetaMan reminded me...

A good flashlight is also a good distraction for kids (if they won't try to eat it) to keep them playing in their room

[Purplegrasshopper]

Originally Posted by O_V_N

No friend of mine would accuse me of not properly parenting my children. Put me on your ignore list please.

I meant no disrespect, and I apologize if you were offended by my observation and suggestion. If you are having problems as a parent, you might want to consider seeking professional help from a child psychologist or counselor who specializes in parenting. Good luck!

[Another_Dude]

Originally Posted by Purplegrasshopper

You're using the other baby as an excuse not to properly parent your 3-year old. And my "idea" is the correct method. Ask any child psychologist. But I wish you the best. And remember, the world is what we make of it, perfect or otherwise. Good day, my friend.

Correct method?

If you, and the "experts", want to train a child to think that they are in charge of the household then you have the correct method. How would this work when they go to school?

At three the child is old enough to know what is acceptable behavior and what isn't, and to be taught not to do the unacceptable things and that the parents are in charge. Teaching them to keep doing the wrong thing over and over because Mom and Dad don't have anything better to do, as earlier suggested, isn't going to work.

If the kid gets up once, find out why. Are they thirsty or have to go to the bathroom? OK, address that and its back to bed being told that it is past bedtime and they have to stay there. Get up again, level one correction. Taking away a toy or a warnnig for a swat on the butt. Get up again? Follow through on prior message by doing what you said you'd do. Get up again? Increase the correction. Eventually the child has to understand that if they do what Mom and Dad said not to it won't be any fun for them.

There is no way my parents would have walked me back to bed more than twice, and I understood that pushing their limits make my backside sore.

[Purplegrasshopper]

Originally Posted by Another_Dude

Correct method?

If you, and the "experts", want to train a child to think that they are in charge of the household then you have the correct method. How would this work when they go to school?

At three the child is old enough to know what is acceptable behavior and what isn't, and to be taught not to do the unacceptable things and that the parents are in charge. Teaching them to keep doing the wrong thing over and over because Mom and Dad don't have anything better to do, as earlier suggested, isn't going to work.

If the kid gets up once, find out why. Are they thirsty or have to go to the bathroom? OK, address that and its back to bed being told that it is past bedtime and they have to stay there. Get up again, level one correction. Taking away a toy or a warnnig for a swat on the butt. Get up again? Follow through on prior message by doing what you said you'd do. Get up again? Increase the correction. Eventually the child has to understand that if they do what Mom and Dad said not to it won't be any fun for them.

There is no way my parents would have walked me back to bed more than twice, and I understood that pushing their limits make my backside sore.

You obviously don't understand the method I described, because it certainly does not teach a child that they are the boss of the house.

There are different schools of thought. If you want to teach your child to do as you say in fear of being physically hurt by your hand, that is your choice. Most "experts" in child rearing agree that physical discipline is not the way to teach a child right from wrong.

[Another_Dude]

Originally Posted by Purplegrasshopper

You obviously don't understand the method I described, because it certainly does not teach a child that they are the boss of the house.

Originally Posted by Purplegrasshopper

To the OP: You mentioned she keeps coming out of the room. Well, keep putting her back. Who cares that it takes hours. Being a parent is not easy. It's about consistency and a battle of will power. The second you give in, you've taught them the wrong lesson. Sooner or later, the child will learn that when you put her in bed, she needs to stay there. Your daughter is testing you, nothing more. Don't get lazy; keep putting her back in the bed, no matter how many times she gets up and comes out and no matter how long she does it for.

That is the kid being in charge.

The parent asked her not to do something. Now for the rest of the night she can disobey for as long as she feels like, putting the parents on her schedule, with no repercussion. What, exactly, is the child learning from this method?

How about, "Mom and Dad said not to do this. I can still do it if I want, for as long as I want, and they aren't going to do anything about it other than restarting the process."

I'll pass on that.

[Blu-Benny]

i agree w/dude, purp....do u have kids???

[DarkDune]

Originally Posted by Another_Dude

That is the kid being in charge.

The parent asked her not to do something. Now for the rest of the night she can disobey for as long as she feels like, putting the parents on her schedule, with no repercussion. What, exactly, is the child learning from this method?

How about, "Mom and Dad said not to do this. I can still do it if I want, for as long as I want, and they aren't going to do anything about it other than restarting the process."

I'll pass on that.

This is why I mentioned taking a toy they have clutched in their hand will force them to realize it is "our way" not theirs.

Kids don't mean anything by this. Try not to get mad, just set them straight...they will eventually get it.

I also talk to my son about all the fun things he did that day, and tell him if he sleeps, we can do MORE fun things tomorrow.

Be careful what you promise too, cause they WILL wake up and ask you to give them what you promised!

I have a colleague at work I do this to too ...My son got it before he has

[DarkDune]

Originally Posted by O_V_N

While that seems like a good idea in a perfect world, that does not work for us. We have another baby in the house, and the 3-year old's crying and screaming while we try to walk her back to her room inevitably wakes up the baby. Which leads to more issues.

How is locking a door child abuse?



We've tried 3 different kinds, and my 3-year old has managed to disassemble all of them within minutes. LOL. Hope yours work better.

Personally, I close the door but do not lock it. This way our son doesn't feel trapped...if he has to get out to go to the potty, he still can.

It starts to get better the closer they get to 4 or 5.

Take something away from them they care more about than going to bed and then let them know they can have it if they stay in bed.