Is anything in your personal life "sacred"?

[Chordata]

I feel like I'm an open book. I will talk about anything. My sex life, health abnormalities, my family, my job, etc. (I don't give out my address, my SSN, my kids' names, etc. -- I do have some sense.)

But really, when it comes to talking about my personal life, I can't think of anything that's "off limits."

What about you?

[Blu-Benny]

if the topic comes up and i've got something to say about it, i'm comfortable talking about pretty much anything.

[Q?]

There are limits, though I try to consider and balance what to share, I'm just a human, a flawed human so I would have no problem pointing them out.

[pentatonic]

It all depends to whom I'm talking to, but in general when surrounded by friends, I'm pretty open about stuff.

[mikejet]

I'll talk about almost anything with most people that I feel comfortable with. Of course there are somethings I never tell anyone. EVER.

[MaCruz]

It depends who it is. If it's a long time best friend, yes I can talk just about anything.

[fatediesel]

I try to keep my personal life pretty personal, and there are things I won't discuss with anyone. If someone asks me a question and I don't want to answer I'll tell them I won't answer it. One of my best friends was trying to get me to talk about my salary last week and each time I just told him I wouldn't answer because it's none of his business.

[BStecke]

I won't be very specific with things like where I live, but everything else I don't care about.

Fate, not to pick on you, but I've known a lot of people who won't talk about money, especially with their kids. I've never understood it. My circle of friends are the same way . . . nobody throws it in anybody's face, but if it comes up, nobody has a problem talking about it. I've always known what my parents made, which I thought was good, since I had some sort of an idea of what the cost of our lifestyle was growing up, which I think has given me more motivation to be successful. Of course, my current situation doesn't reflect that, but I'm in the process of rectifying that

Again, not to criticize your choice, I've just never found that salary was something I felt I need to keep secret.

[fatediesel]

Part of the reason I won't talk about money, especially with this certain friend, is that I make a lot more money than they do and don't know if they realize just how much I make, especially if I were to bring up bonuses and stock dividends. I think they have some idea, but I don't see an upside in getting specific. While I wouldn't have gotten specific anyways, I definitely wasn't going to tell last week because someone that works for the same company as me was there and he definitely shouldn't know what I make.

[mikejet]

I've learned that in your workplace, you NEVER discuss how much you make with anyone.

[MaCruz]

Originally Posted by mikejet

I've learned that in your workplace, you NEVER discuss how much you make with anyone.

That and I don't really talk about my personal life as well. Just let me do my damn work so I can go home. I don't need to be mixed around with the office gossip.

There's maybe one or 2 co-workers I talk to and they are guys since the majority here are women.

[Q?]

Originally Posted by mikejet

I've learned that in your workplace, you NEVER discuss how much you make with anyone.

No. 1. "Hey... what's up?"

No. 2. "Not much.... just curious, how much do you earn per hour?"

No. 1. "uhm... about 17 dollars"

No. 2. "wow... you could work for me lol and it still wouldn't affect me, lol again"

No. 1. "...."

[mikejet]

Originally Posted by MaCruz

That and I don't really talk about my personal life as well. Just let me do my damn work so I can go home. I don't need to be mixed around with the office gossip.

There's maybe one or 2 co-workers I talk to and they are guys since the majority here are women.

The only coworkers I talk to are one's I don't directly need to interact with on work. Like if I have to work on something with another coworkers I'm not going to be friend's with them.

But other floors and other people around campus, it's all good.

[toef]

Originally Posted by BStecke

I won't be very specific with things like where I live, but everything else I don't care about.

Fate, not to pick on you, but I've known a lot of people who won't talk about money, especially with their kids. I've never understood it. My circle of friends are the same way . . . nobody throws it in anybody's face, but if it comes up, nobody has a problem talking about it. I've always known what my parents made, which I thought was good, since I had some sort of an idea of what the cost of our lifestyle was growing up, which I think has given me more motivation to be successful. Of course, my current situation doesn't reflect that, but I'm in the process of rectifying that

Again, not to criticize your choice, I've just never found that salary was something I felt I need to keep secret.

I always thought it was kind of weird, but in a way I understand it. If you make a lot of money, people may be able to tell, so they shouldn't have to wonder. And if you tell them, it may seem like you're gloating ("I make more, so I'm better than you").

It works both ways though. If a person makes less than what he thinks all of his friends make, I can understand why his ego would prevent him from divulging his salary.

That being said, it's not always easy to tell how much someone makes, just by looking at them.

I know people making mid-six figures that look like they make $40k a year, based on the cars they drive, how they dress, etc. (their house would obviously give it away though).

And then I know guys making $30-40k who are trying to pretend they make more (by spending all their money on their image).

But if you know them well enough, you know what they do, and can guesstimate from that.

I think society in general equates success (all-encompassingly, success in life, worth as a person, etc) with wealth, so people who are self-conscious about appearing successful will try to put up a front about how much they are making.

If someone is afraid of appearing unsuccessful, based on his salary, I can see why he'd not talk about it.

Originally Posted by mikejet

I've learned that in your workplace, you NEVER discuss how much you make with anyone.

That's a great trick employers play, which I've always hated.

Two people doing the same job, the same way, should be paid the same amount. Period.

But if the company managed to hire Person B for a lot less money than Person A, the company obviously benefits from Person B not knowing how underpaid s/he is.

By insisting that employees not discuss pay information, it allows the company to keep cheating some of its employees. Not exactly something I'd want to support.

[toef]

As for the topic, I'd say I'm somewhere in between.

I don't just start leaking information about myself during conversations, but if I'm talking with a good friend, and things come up, then I'll open up more.

Health stuff is probably the main thing I won't talk about, unless it's something like "my tooth hurts" or "cool" injuries, like falling off a mountain bike, down a cliff, and breaking a leg.

I think there's some amount of dignity involved with keeping parts of your personal life personal.

But I also think that opening up, somewhat, to close friends can build stronger relationships with them.

[mikejet]

Originally Posted by toef

That's a great trick employers play, which I've always hated.

Two people doing the same job, the same way, should be paid the same amount. Period.

But if the company managed to hire Person B for a lot less money than Person A, the company obviously benefits from Person B not knowing how underpaid s/he is.

By insisting that employees not discuss pay information, it allows the company to keep cheating some of its employees. Not exactly something I'd want to support.

Maybe for simple jobs like retail that would apply but for higher paying performance based work it shouldn't. Person A could be doing more work in the same job description as Person B and deserves the extra pay. Person B doesn't need to know it.

[P@t_Mtl]

There are certain things I will just talk about with people either at work or with certain friends.

The only person who know all of my dark secrets is my wife

[toef]

Originally Posted by mikejet

Maybe for simple jobs like retail that would apply but for higher paying performance based work it shouldn't. Person A could be doing more work in the same job description as Person B and deserves the extra pay. Person B doesn't need to know it.

Well yeah, which is why I said two people doing the same work should make the same amount of money.

It's not even just retail work. If anything, retail work might more appropriately be unbalanced. Two guys might both stock shelves at Target, but if one can lift heavier items, or one stocks shelves more neatly, then a difference in pay is ok.

If it's just two people sitting in an office building, mindlessly filing reports on a computer, there's no reason one should really make more than the other. They're both just processing information. And I think that's a vast majority of office workers.

One way to test it... if you take a few days off of work, and your office/job/whatever gets along just fine while you're gone, then you don't deserve to make more than anyone else there.

Unless you're bringing something special to the table, you shouldn't be paid more than other people.

[GLaDOS]

My personal life is okay, but sometimes I think most of my friends are ignorant and it's sometimes hard to communicate with my parents. I need improvement on my social life, but then again why do I need friends? Who needs ****ing friends anyway!?

[Johnny Vinyl]

Originally Posted by toef

Well yeah, which is why I said two people doing the same work should make the same amount of money.

It's not even just retail work. If anything, retail work might more appropriately be unbalanced. Two guys might both stock shelves at Target, but if one can lift heavier items, or one stocks shelves more neatly, then a difference in pay is ok.

If it's just two people sitting in an office building, mindlessly filing reports on a computer, there's no reason one should really make more than the other. They're both just processing information. And I think that's a vast majority of office workers.

One way to test it... if you take a few days off of work, and your office/job/whatever gets along just fine while you're gone, then you don't deserve to make more than anyone else there.

Unless you're bringing something special to the table, you shouldn't be paid more than other people.

I disagree completely with that assessment. They both are jobs of equal value...one accomplishes it by doing the heavier gruntwork...the other does it by getting the store "showtime" ready. There is no difference in "value" here....only a difference in method.

Regarding personal issues, there are things that I will never share with anyone...although I am a fairly open book.

John

John