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Old 04-24-2014, 02:17 AM   #41
Jennifer Lawrence Fan Jennifer Lawrence Fan is offline
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That's awesome dude! Keep up the good work!
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Old 05-08-2014, 02:50 AM   #42
Jennifer Lawrence Fan Jennifer Lawrence Fan is offline
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Let me ask you how does this sound for a script idea?

The story is about a hot ass looking girl. Think Jennifer Lawrence, or Scar Jo hot. Any celeb people on the internet thinks is really good looking.

Anyway there is this smoking hot girl. She dresses & looks beautiful. But acts like a dude. She farts and burps more than any guy, has the messiest apartment ever. Says the most vulgar, raunchiest things. Worse than any guy. She's like this cause she was raised with like 5-6 brothers and is the youngest.

Because of who she is and how she acts. She has trouble with men. Cause I'm sure it doesn't matter how hot a girl is. There's only so much that a guy can take of it. But it's not her fault. That's just how she was raised.

So this only leaves her with one option. Internet dating. She strikes up a internet relationship with this one guy. They've never met only talked online and have exchanged pictures of one another.

All is going good until he finally wants to meet her in person. She keeps saying no. But realizes that if she keeps saying no. He'll stop talking to her and she really likes him. So she agrees to it. Even though she knows it's not a good idea. He's from a different state, so he makes plans to arrive to meet her the next month.

So with the short amount of time she has before her "internet Boyfriend" She uses this time to become more lady like with the help of her friends & brothers.

It'll almost in a way be like those Melissa McCarthy movies where she plays the fat slob like character. But instead of a fat slob like character. It'll be a hot ass chick instead. I mean about it. You never really see anything like this. It's either a guy like this ALA Zach Galafankis (SP) or what Melissa McCarthy does in every single one of her movies. You can't say she doesn't. Cause she really does.

The Tagline could be Rude and Crude with Boobs.

The name of it would be Chick-A-Dude

Sounds funny, right? Or atleast I do. Shows people not only guys can act or be like that. Maybe even get someone like a Jennifer Lawrence to star in it. I feel she think it's funny. She likes farts already. So we're already half way there.

I swear i come up with my ideas than stuff i write anymore. I have about 15 or more script ideas to work on. I try starting a new thing and just think of more ideas for stuff. Thought it sounds sorta original right or a new twist on something old we've seen.
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Old 05-08-2014, 03:01 AM   #43
AmandaBanana AmandaBanana is offline
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I've always tried, but have never been able to really complete one. I'd love to write one...or at least co-write one someday depending on the writing partner and, more importantly, the story.
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Old 05-08-2014, 03:12 AM   #44
Jennifer Lawrence Fan Jennifer Lawrence Fan is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AmandaBanana View Post
I've always tried, but have never been able to really complete one. I'd love to write one...or at least co-write one someday depending on the writing partner and, more importantly, the story.
What's the farthest that you've ever gotten?
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Old 05-08-2014, 06:04 AM   #45
RAPTURExREDS RAPTURExREDS is offline
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I finished my first screenplay a few months ago, and plan to start my second sometime this summer.
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Old 05-08-2014, 11:46 AM   #46
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Michael Bay Fan View Post
Let me ask you how does this sound for a script idea?

The story is about a hot ass looking girl. Think Jennifer Lawrence, or Scar Jo hot. Any celeb people on the internet thinks is really good looking.

Anyway there is this smoking hot girl. She dresses & looks beautiful. But acts like a dude. She farts and burps more than any guy, has the messiest apartment ever. Says the most vulgar, raunchiest things. Worse than any guy. She's like this cause she was raised with like 5-6 brothers and is the youngest.

Because of who she is and how she acts. She has trouble with men. Cause I'm sure it doesn't matter how hot a girl is. There's only so much that a guy can take of it. But it's not her fault. That's just how she was raised.

So this only leaves her with one option. Internet dating. She strikes up a internet relationship with this one guy. They've never met only talked online and have exchanged pictures of one another.

All is going good until he finally wants to meet her in person. She keeps saying no. But realizes that if she keeps saying no. He'll stop talking to her and she really likes him. So she agrees to it. Even though she knows it's not a good idea. He's from a different state, so he makes plans to arrive to meet her the next month.

So with the short amount of time she has before her "internet Boyfriend" She uses this time to become more lady like with the help of her friends & brothers.

It'll almost in a way be like those Melissa McCarthy movies where she plays the fat slob like character. But instead of a fat slob like character. It'll be a hot ass chick instead. I mean about it. You never really see anything like this. It's either a guy like this ALA Zach Galafankis (SP) or what Melissa McCarthy does in every single one of her movies. You can't say she doesn't. Cause she really does.

The Tagline could be Rude and Crude with Boobs.

The name of it would be Chick-A-Dude

Sounds funny, right? Or atleast I do. Shows people not only guys can act or be like that. Maybe even get someone like a Jennifer Lawrence to star in it. I feel she think it's funny. She likes farts already. So we're already half way there.

I swear i come up with my ideas than stuff i write anymore. I have about 15 or more script ideas to work on. I try starting a new thing and just think of more ideas for stuff. Thought it sounds sorta original right or a new twist on something old we've seen.
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Old 05-08-2014, 12:10 PM   #47
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Yeah, I don't think that is something Jennifer Lawrence would go for. Best bet would be Anna Faris. Still, don't think I'd waste too much time on that idea.
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Old 05-09-2014, 02:46 AM   #48
AmandaBanana AmandaBanana is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Michael Bay Fan View Post
What's the farthest that you've ever gotten?
Couple of outlines and a few dozen pages here and there. Unfortunately, they all end up resembling/echoing previous established works and I subsequently abandon them. Originality is a difficult thing.
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Old 05-09-2014, 03:44 AM   #49
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Michael Bay Fan View Post
Let me ask you how does this sound for a script idea?

The story is about a hot ass looking girl. Think Jennifer Lawrence, or Scar Jo hot. Any celeb people on the internet thinks is really good looking.

Anyway there is this smoking hot girl. She dresses & looks beautiful. But acts like a dude. She farts and burps more than any guy, has the messiest apartment ever. Says the most vulgar, raunchiest things. Worse than any guy. She's like this cause she was raised with like 5-6 brothers and is the youngest.

Because of who she is and how she acts. She has trouble with men. Cause I'm sure it doesn't matter how hot a girl is. There's only so much that a guy can take of it. But it's not her fault. That's just how she was raised.

So this only leaves her with one option. Internet dating. She strikes up a internet relationship with this one guy. They've never met only talked online and have exchanged pictures of one another.

All is going good until he finally wants to meet her in person. She keeps saying no. But realizes that if she keeps saying no. He'll stop talking to her and she really likes him. So she agrees to it. Even though she knows it's not a good idea. He's from a different state, so he makes plans to arrive to meet her the next month.

So with the short amount of time she has before her "internet Boyfriend" She uses this time to become more lady like with the help of her friends & brothers.

It'll almost in a way be like those Melissa McCarthy movies where she plays the fat slob like character. But instead of a fat slob like character. It'll be a hot ass chick instead. I mean about it. You never really see anything like this. It's either a guy like this ALA Zach Galafankis (SP) or what Melissa McCarthy does in every single one of her movies. You can't say she doesn't. Cause she really does.

The Tagline could be Rude and Crude with Boobs.

The name of it would be Chick-A-Dude

Sounds funny, right? Or atleast I do. Shows people not only guys can act or be like that. Maybe even get someone like a Jennifer Lawrence to star in it. I feel she think it's funny. She likes farts already. So we're already half way there.

I swear i come up with my ideas than stuff i write anymore. I have about 15 or more script ideas to work on. I try starting a new thing and just think of more ideas for stuff. Thought it sounds sorta original right or a new twist on something old we've seen.
That's got "Adam Sandler in a dual role" written all over it. Send him the script.
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Old 05-09-2014, 04:19 AM   #50
Bladerunner5375 Bladerunner5375 is offline
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Check out The SCREENWRITERS WORKBOOK by Syd Field. It is a great help, like a step by step WORKBOOK for writing a screenplay.
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Old 05-09-2014, 04:58 AM   #51
Jennifer Lawrence Fan Jennifer Lawrence Fan is offline
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Here are some other ideas of mine.

Quote:
Man loses movie collection in a accident. But this helps him discover the life he never knew he had. And the possibilities out there.

The start of the film would show a guy who really has no life but his movies. He has friends and they come over to try and get him out to do things. But he's way too interested in his movies to have any kind of life. About 20-30 minutes or so into the movie that's where the accident happens. Whether it be a fire, hurricane or even theft.

But he had insurance on this, but it will take him sometime to get the money for his stuff. And with having no movies to watch he follows his friends advice and starts to really have a life for the first time really and is really enjoying what he missed out in his life here. That'll be the whole second act.

The end of the second act ends with him being told that he'll be getting a huge check for all his movies that were insured. The third act deals with will he use that money to buy back all the movies he loves, or will he use it to continue on with his new lifestyle?
Quote:
It deals with these 4 guys. Around their late 20's early 30's. They go out for one last night of fun of Devils Night October 30th And accidentally release or conjure up Samhain and a bunch of other demon creatures who start to terrorize people.

It's it's up to the 4 guys and a few other people to find a way to stop this before the end of Halloween or they will take over and it will be night forever with all the creatures taking over for good. it be Horror Comedy.

Some comedy from the guys and some comedy from the creatures. Like they see a couple in a car going at it. They watch for a bit until they start to get curious. The girl thinks its her Boyfriend till they see a creature there being pervy. lol. the Samhain character will be serious and scary as shit though. So would some of the druid guys aswell too.
Quote:
The story of a group of people called Sleepers. They're these people who did these special dreams who are getting paid while being pumped with a experimental drug that helps people who can't sleep.

But the people doing these tests to others don't know the drug has a special side effect for some, while not affecting others. Ones that allow you to jump into the dreams of anyone else.

Our main character does these tests for extra money for college, but soon after discovers what he can do from these drugs. He uses it in any way that he can for his own advantage and or entertainment.

The main character jumps into a dream of one of the girls from his college class. But he finds out she's just like him. By jumping into his own dreams after he leaves hers. Once they found out about each other they team up in a way to dream jump and mess with people screwing with them. Until they come across the wrong persons dreams.

Soon after our main character discovers other people with the same ability, but aren't being so cutesy as him. With this one using their new found powers for murder and gain wealth. As he murders them in their sleep and then robs their houses.

The killer meets our main character randomly in one of his dreams. But after a fight our main character survives waking up. Only to find out a day later someone has been killed and is being accused of murder. When he know it was the killer who did it to get back at him. So they need to catch the killer and clear their name after all the killings going on.

It be a elements of Jumper, Nightmare On Elm Street and Shocker. I would say it be a mixture of Horror and Action, but mainly horror. Though the start of the film would be funny and jokey going into people's dreams messing with them, but soon after turns deadly serious with the horrors of it.

Sleepers can do or become anything in the dreams of those they enter into.
Quote:
The main story would focus on this group of people who went to summer camp. The camp they've been going to eventually closes down and they all lose touch over the years.

it's been almost 20 years and they all get a letter gets a letter. The letter is from one of their summer campers. One over the years who has made a fortune, but recently passed away. And in his will he made sure to have those letters sent out to his fellow campers. The letter was asking all who received the letter if they were willing to come back to their old summer camp for one more round. And as incentives there would be a cash prize given for those who win the summer camp games I guess you could call them.

It be the Guys Vs. the Girls. And for those that don't wanna attend they don't have too. But they don't get any prizes if they don't attend and participate.

The rules would be only there's two rules. Rule #1 No fighting in any way shape or form. #2 No one will sleep together. If caught both will be eliminated and sent home and given no prize. Those are the only two rules. But like people have said, some rules are meant to be broken and most likely will.

It's a Elimination game. One has to eliminate the entire team to win. the remaining winners split the prize. So if 3 people are left on one team they split it. And if one person is left they get the whole prize themselves.

It's also about rekindling lost friendships and also lost loves. And how people were than and who they are or how they changed. Either for the good or the bad. It'll just be a fun film that takes place in the summer time and all the games they gonna play.
Quote:
I have a idea for a Slasher/Cop movie. Loosely influenced on the ending of Scream 4 about all these people becoming famous for nothing. so called "reality stars" from such shows as Jersey Shore, 16 and Pregnant, Teen Mom, The Hills and all kinds of other shows like that, anyone with a reality show really, but yet basically have no talent and shouldn't have these shows. Now the people wouldn't be from those shows, but something similar that mocks all of those shows and to show how silly they really are. And why people even really watch them in the first place.

The plot of the movie would be someone is killing off all these reality stars and posting their deaths online anonymously, calling it the ultimate reality show. And these videos become big hits all over the net, even know the people know these are real killings, but is just too good of a show to pass up. The videos are banned and pulled off sites, but keep popping up and posted on all other social sites and people commenting being the vicious *******s like how people really are today and not caring that a real person has been killed for their own selfish pleasure.

This is where the cop part comes in. It's up to this one cop to crackdown on the killer who is killing all these reality stars, even if they are really worthless in life to begin with. But he knows its wrong to kill these people, cause they still are really basically people yet, even if you don't like their shows they are on. I've got the perfect title for it. "The Real Reality" It would to be how much of a vicious cycle of people we really are for our entertainment and not caring where it really comes from, as long as it entertains us in the first place. And point fingers at the reality craze that has swept over everyone, and that they too could be on a show like that if they act foolish enough.
Quote:
Here's something a little out of my wheel barrel I guess you could say. It's more dramatic like. With a bit of comedy in there.

It takes place of the course of one night or so. Someone finds pictures and other belongings to either their deceased parent or spouse and they have memories of the past from that night those pics happen.

The film would take place in current and past. But mainly in the past due to all the memories. Just a look back at the one special night in their lives before they truly had to grow up and finally becomes adults in their lives. The past would be in the late 90's around 1999-2000 of the new century. You'd have new and old versions of characters of then and now.

The title would be called Here's To The Night.

Could also implement found footage in a way, but not really though.

Like a teenager gets grounded, and they find these VHS tapes about their parents. And basically how they meet that night and became a couple. The videos would show that the parent(The Mom, cause the dad would have just suddenly passed away) And it would show she was not always like she is now. I don't know, I'm just thinking of things. Like the current times could be book marks for the acts. It start with current time, then go back to the past. then the act finishes up back in the present. And you do that for all three acts of the film.
Quote:
It would pretty much take place at a Drive In movie theater and the snack bar place. The movie would take place during the last few days of the closing drive in. There also be a side plot of someone making a documentary about the old drive in (likely a employee that works there) They would interview people of that town in the streets catching people doing stuff out and about. And the end of the closing would close with the documentary that was filmed.

Might sound boring I guess. I'm sure I could add other aspects and character stuff. Sure I could maybe make it a coming of age story. But make the person a bit older who really never grew up, and with this happening makes them realize something and you could add a girl in there as well to motivate him.

Plus I feel that you could do this on small to little budget really. Just get a drive in theater, a snack place and that's about it really.
Quote:
Do you like Westerns? if so how about Vampire ones? What if someone were somehow to mix the two together?

I had the idea for a Vampire Western. Well, atleast the first 20 minutes or so would take place in the west while the rest of it would take place between
that and the current time.

A lawman back in the Wild West Times is tracking a vampire and catches and kills his crew. As a punishment he kills the lawman's family and disappears. Leaving the lawman with his regrets of nothing being able to save her family from this and has to die with it, or does he? He finds a vampire and kills him and takes his blood and ingests it. making him part vampire so that he can live long enough to search out for the vampire that
killed his family.

It'll be the lines of Angel and Blade. It'll show him tracking down vampires through out the years to catch the main one he's after. And then the last
hour or so takes place in present times. He's working as a private eye down in the south maybe Louisiana and someone asks to find a missing family member of theirs and they finally find that vampire that killed his family and is one of the most important people there.

It'll be very adult orientated, by that almost every character will be a grown up, no teens really, unless its minor side characters. I wanna try and do
something different here, alot of my stuff I've done has teens in them. I'm interested to hear your thoughts on this at all and if you think its a good idea
Quote:
You know I've been thinking about Pain and Gain for a while. and the whole story behind it. I watched online something on 48 hours about the real events that went down. And it makes you think the type of stuff people are willing to go through in life to get that type of life style, or their dream/goals in life. Kinda got me thinking of an idea for a script that could perhaps happen in real life.

it be about these group of failed film makers who tried making a film but couldn't get the funding and they lost everything in their lives. But they have a family member, friend or Girlfriend that know a famous hot shot movie producer, one in fact they've met before and is the one who in fact turned them down and ruined their lives cause of it. The producer said their script for a movie was horrible and they never work in this town ever with writing like that. So they kidnap and force him to find their movie or stuff will happen to his family and or friends if he doesn't. It would also follow the process of them trying to make a movie and failing horribly cause they don't have the skills set. All while the guys is still in captive yet hearing about all their activities. After a while shit just rolls down hill in a crazy bizarre way.

Almost like a just cause you have a idea or dream doesn't mean that you should try it thing. As if these people knew nothing about what they were trying to do, but wanted to do it cause they've seen others do it with great success. As they were stubborn and once they had an idea they wouldn't take no for a answer. Even if they know nothing about what they were trying to achieve. That's something I could see some insane group of people doing. Why? Cause they figured it was the easiest way to do so in the quickest manner. The people would be really seedy, not so well people who get mad in a flash of a second if something goes wrong.
Quote:
A ghost comedy about a popular teen who's accidentally killed and turned into a ghost. But still wants to continue to go to school yet and help his unpopular friend out in High School.

It could be PG-13 Or R. If it were R there could be a scene of the Ghost Teen going into the Girl's locker room to check out the naked girls in there. Cause I mean what teenage boy wouldn't want to be invisible in the girls locker room, don't tell me you never though of it before.

The Title could be called School Spirit. As a double meaning of people always say where's your school Spirit at? or don't you have any School Spirit? I feel it could just be a really fun perhaps raunchy movie that alot of people could enjoy.
Quote:
I had a idea for another movie. You could call it cheesy. The title is called "Our First Kiss" Its a romantic comedy I guess you could call it. I might add a bit of raunchiness like all great Apatow type films. Basically the whole movie is the guy wanting to kiss his dream girl and all kinds of things happen through out it keeping them apart and then after everything thing is said and done and finished. He finally gets to kiss the girl. and then smash to black! End of movie! Then maybe have a end scene that's a musical sorta like a mixture of the end scene of 40 year old virgin and High School Musical.
Now I'm sure whoever reads these will either think they all sucks, some are good or all of them are good. Likely guessing the first or hopefully second.

Last edited by Jennifer Lawrence Fan; 05-09-2014 at 05:01 AM.
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Old 05-09-2014, 05:16 AM   #52
Thomas Guycott Thomas Guycott is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Michael Bay Fan View Post
It deals with these 4 guys. Around their late 20's early 30's. They go out for one last night of fun of Devils Night October 30th And accidentally release or conjure up Samhain and a bunch of other demon creatures who start to terrorize people.

It's it's up to the 4 guys and a few other people to find a way to stop this before the end of Halloween or they will take over and it will be night forever with all the creatures taking over for good. it be Horror Comedy.
This is almost the exact premise of an episode of The Real Ghostbusters.
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Old 05-09-2014, 05:22 AM   #53
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Michael Bay Fan View Post
A ghost comedy about a popular teen who's accidentally killed and turned into a ghost. But still wants to continue to go to school yet and help his unpopular friend out in High School.

It could be PG-13 Or R. If it were R there could be a scene of the Ghost Teen going into the Girl's locker room to check out the naked girls in there. Cause I mean what teenage boy wouldn't want to be invisible in the girls locker room, don't tell me you never though of it before.

The Title could be called School Spirit. As a double meaning of people always say where's your school Spirit at? or don't you have any School Spirit? I feel it could just be a really fun perhaps raunchy movie that alot of people could enjoy.
So basically this

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Old 05-09-2014, 05:25 AM   #54
Jennifer Lawrence Fan Jennifer Lawrence Fan is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thomas Guycott View Post
This is almost the exact premise of an episode of The Real Ghostbusters.
Kinda. But it'll be done a lot differently. Loosely based if you will. Plus it's just a idea anyway. I doubt anything will ever come from it.
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Old 05-09-2014, 05:52 AM   #55
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The Real Ghostbusters had some great writers, including future Babylon 5 creator J. Michael Straczynski.

Some genres lend themselves to writing an entire script in advance and some do not. Most comedies end up looking nothing like the submitted scripts.

If you really want to get noticed as a writer, come up with a killer scene to open a movie. Most people will dump a script if it hasn't hooked them within the first 10-20 pages.
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Old 05-09-2014, 05:57 AM   #56
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Michael Bay Fan View Post
Maybe even get someone like a Jennifer Lawrence to star in it. She likes farts already.
I didn't know Jennifer Lawrence likes farts.
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Old 05-09-2014, 06:07 AM   #57
Jennifer Lawrence Fan Jennifer Lawrence Fan is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Clark Kent View Post
The Real Ghostbusters had some great writers, including future Babylon 5 creator J. Michael Straczynski.

Some genres lend themselves to writing an entire script in advance and some do not. Most comedies end up looking nothing like the submitted scripts.

If you really want to get noticed as a writer, come up with a killer scene to open a movie. Most people will dump a script if it hasn't hooked them within the first 10-20 pages.
This part is entirely true. Usually if the script doesn't have their attention within 10 pages they stop.

The script for The Hangover is different than what was in the film. I mean some of the characters traits were still in it. Just in different characters. Say for instance The Stu Character was a semi-overweight dumb jock. Who was married with two kids. The Phil character was single who had money problems. The Alan character in that original script was basically what became of the Stu character in the movie. Leslie Chow who wasn't called that in the script was a short overweight Hawaiian guy. Only character that was the same both in the script and movie was Doug. It had Alot of the same jokes and beats.

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I didn't know Jennifer Lawrence likes farts.
Yep. All the more reason to love her.
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Old 05-09-2014, 07:19 AM   #58
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Okay Michael Bay Fan, I read all those pitches you posted up there, and as someone who considers himself fairly well read, written and watched on film, I think I can best sum up my advice as follows:

You really need to get your head out of high school.

From my point of view, most of your pitches reflect the lack of a wider perspective on life experience, or to put in another way, lack an adult perspective on the world. The actual text of these pitches, the words themselves (focus on young teens as characters, descriptive terms and comparisons, etc: that reality show killer pitch is bitter as hell), reveals a somewhat young and naive frame of mind, and as a consequence end up telling totally uninteresting stories (Who cares if some sperglord collects insurance on his DVD collection? That's not a movie. Fifteen years isn't nostalgic enough of a past to reflect on, and your protagonist would only be 14. Who cares?) or consist of tenuous genre mash-ups derived from what sounds cool.

But I'd say the biggest issue with most of these pitches is that none of them really have a story, or at the very least a story hook: they're all about premise and plot. You're putting premise and plot ahead of story, and you can't do that because you'll only end up with something held together purely by plot momentum which falls apart because it lacks a strong core in story that provides momentum to the plot: Story is what happens, plot is how it happens. Come up with a story worth telling and then you can build everything else up around that, and to tell a story you often literally have to start from the ground up: Jean-Luc Goddard once said "all you need to make a movie is a girl and a gun."

A final point of advice I would give concerns how you format the pitch/summary itself. Concentrate less on justifying the movie's existence, explaining aspects of the premise, or how the world works and more on tying up everything in a simple package. A single paragraph should be enough to sum up what a movie's about and function as a pitch, and some say if you can't summarize a movie in a single sentence (the "elevator pitch") then you've failed. I wouldn't go quite that drastic but it's a good thing to keep in mind.

For what it's worth I do like your drive-in idea, although I would drop the documentary aspect and make it more like an American Graffiti for the classic drive-in scene.

Edit: I have a handful of ideas of my own which I might share with the thread later.

Last edited by Thomas Guycott; 05-09-2014 at 07:36 AM.
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Old 05-09-2014, 07:36 AM   #59
Jennifer Lawrence Fan Jennifer Lawrence Fan is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thomas Guycott View Post
Okay Michael Bay Fan, I read all those pitches you posted up there, and as someone who considers himself fairly well read, written and watched on film, I think I can best sum up my advice as follows:

You really need to get your head out of high school.

From my point of view, most of your pitches reflect the lack of a wider perspective on life experience, or to put in another way, lack an adult perspective on the world. The actual text of these pitches, the words themselves (focus on young teens as characters, descriptive terms and comparisons, etc: that reality show killer pitch is bitter as hell), reveals a somewhat young and naive frame of mind, and as a consequence end up telling totally uninteresting stories (Who cares if some sperglord collects insurance on his DVD collection? That's not a movie. Fifteen years isn't nostalgic enough of a past to reflect on, and your protagonist would only be 14. Who cares?) or consist of tenuous genre mash-ups derived from what sounds cool.

But I'd say the biggest issue with most of these pitches is that none of them really have a story, or at the very least a story hook: they're all about premise and plot. You're putting premise and plot ahead of story, and you can't do that because you'll only end up with something held together purely by plot momentum which falls apart because it lacks a strong core in story that provides momentum to the plot: Story is what happens, plot is how it happens. Come up with a story worth telling and then you can build everything else up around that, and to tell a story you often literally have to start from the ground up: Jean-Luc Goddard once said "all you need to make a movie is a girl and a gun."

A final point of advice I would give concerns how you format the pitch/summary itself. Concentrate less on justifying the movie's existence, explaining aspects of the premise, or how the world works and more on tying up everything in a simple package. A single paragraph should be enough to sum up what a movie's about and function as a pitch, and some say if you can't summarize a movie in a single sentence (the "elevator pitch") then you've failed. I wouldn't go quite that drastic but it's a good thing to keep in mind.

For what it's worth I do like your drive-in idea, although I would drop the documentary aspect and make it more like an American Graffiti for the classic drive-in scene.
I mean this isn't stuff I would say to a studio. I just posted some basic stuff that I thought of. I know it could have been worded better. It was a idea I thought of and put on a note pad. And just copied and pasted that from there onto here. I know alot of those ideas need work for stuff. Why there still ideas yet and not scripts.

I know what you mean about summing up the movies in a sentence or so. I'm sure that I could do that do. I just half-ass alot of those things quickly on here. But as I said. If i were going into a meeting it be more professional.

I guess if one idea out of so many is not bad. It's not a complete waste.

All of those are just ideas at the moment. And sure once or if i start writing them they will eventually change.
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Old 05-09-2014, 10:24 AM   #60
PopcornBandit PopcornBandit is online now
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I have a couple of decent outlines. The problem for me is finding the time to sit and write the actual scripts.
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