Breaking Up With Xbox 360

[Elandyll]

It's meant as a funny piece, not a controversial "mine is bigger than yours" or anything like that
I admit I cracked up while reading that.

http://www.goodgearguide.com.au/arti...4194304&fpid=1

Breaking Up With Xbox 360
If the Xbox 360 was your girlfriend, she’d be an unstable, high-maintenance gold-digger.

Now I ain't seeing she's a gold digger... If the Xbox 360 was your girlfriend, she’d be an unstable, high-maintenance gold-digger. An anonymous games journalist runs with this analogy and kicks his 'ex'-box to the curb…



Sit down, we need to talk.

It’s no secret that things haven’t been perfect between us. Don't get me wrong, I still enjoy spending time with you and we've had some really fun times together. Hell, I remember the night we met like it was only yesterday. You were so cool and glamorous — like no other console I’d ever met. I dumped PlayStation 2 for you on the spot. She was pissed, but I didn't care: it was love at first sight.

For a while, everything was perfect. The online gaming, the awesome graphics, the constant stream of kickass games: it was like a dream come true. But then you started to change.

I guess my feelings changed towards you on our third Xbox Live Gold anniversary. Once again, you expected me to renew our relationship with cold, hard cash. It was the same story on our first wireless date together — $100+ for a WiFi adaptor? I felt so used! Then you tried to charge me to look at free social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter. That was the final straw.

All I wanted to do was spend time with you, and you kept treating me like your own personal money tree. Where was the love? Where was the respect? Y'know, they have a name for consoles like you — Kanye West wrote a song about it.

And it's not just about the money. You’re also the most high-maintenance console I've ever met. If I don’t treat you like a piece of porcelain glass, you start to give me the ‘silent treatment’ (AKA Red Ring of Death). I want a console I can be rough with for a change; a console that doesn’t mind getting a little dirty.

Look, there’s no easy way to say this, so I’ll just come right out with it. I've fallen for somebody else. I’m not telling you this to hurt you, but you deserve to know the truth. It's not something I planned, it just kind of happened. No, it's not Nintendo Wii. If it were, this would be a whole lot easier.

I’ve - I've been seeing PS3 Slim behind you back. It's been going on for around a month now. When I said I was too tired to go online that night, I was secretly using the PlayStation Network. And when I said I was watching TV… I was really watching Blu-ray.

I know I said I’d never go back to her, but she’s like a completely different console. When she lost all that weight, I couldn’t help myself — I just had to get my hands on her. Free online gaming, inbuilt WiFi, Blu-ray movies and reliable hardware — how was I supposed to refuse? Besides, I want a console I can grow old with. How many years do you think you have left in you? Two? Well, it’s been fun Xbox 360. I really mean that. Hopefully you'll be able to find it in your heart to forgive me. Until then; au revoir.

We’ll always have Gears of War.

[Uniquely]

I broke up with my PS3. She was kind of like a russian weightlifter. All power and no personality or social skills. She would never let me go to parties with all of my friends. Not many people would talk around her. It was like they had no mouths and ears. Her hands (the controllers) just never felt right in my hands. She was really great to take to movies though..... but even that came to a tragic end when she died a premature death. I could have replaced her with a second hand russian weight lifter for $150.... but I decided weightlifting wasn't my thing. Now her cold dead corpse lies in state in my guestroom, awaiting the day when I finally get around to trying to pry my Iron Man disc from her rigored grasp.

[Lord_Stewie]

Originally Posted by robinandtami

I broke up with my PS3. She was kind of like a russian weightlifter. All power and no personality or social skills. She would never let me go to parties with all of my friends. Not many people would talk around her. It was like they had no mouths and ears. Her hands (the controllers) just never felt right in my hands. She was really great to take to movies though..... but even that came to a tragic end when she died a premature death. I could have replaced her with a second hand russian weight lifter for $150.... but I decided weightlifting wasn't my thing. Now her cold dead corpse lies in state in my guestroom, awaiting the day when I finally get around to trying to pry my Iron Man disc from her rigored grasp.

twisted and unfair relationship. I say file for divorce, and press charges. The law system indeed does work.

[Elandyll]

Originally Posted by robinandtami

I broke up with my PS3. She was kind of like a russian weightlifter. All power and no personality or social skills. She would never let me go to parties with all of my friends. Not many people would talk around her. It was like they had no mouths and ears. Her hands (the controllers) just never felt right in my hands. She was really great to take to movies though..... but even that came to a tragic end when she died a premature death. I could have replaced her with a second hand russian weight lifter for $150.... but I decided weightlifting wasn't my thing. Now her cold dead corpse lies in state in my guestroom, awaiting the day when I finally get around to trying to pry my Iron Man disc from her rigored grasp.

Sounds more like she broke up with you. You literally bore her to death...

As per your social circles not mixing up, maybe it was a bad mix from the get go?
Better stay with your FPS loving friends rather than abuse and sicken another innocent PS3 to death

[Uniquely]

Originally Posted by Elandyll

Sounds more like she broke up with you. You literally bore her to death...

She bored me.... then when she didn't earn the attention she thought she deserved..... and saw me giving attention to my other consoles.... she committed suicide. Either way.... she hasn't been missed.

[MCT]

3 years strong with my Wifebox 360. No silent treatment to speak of, ever. Although she does throw bichfits here and there, telling me "my disc isnt clean enough" when I know it is. But we get over that quickly and everything is back to normal.

[Lord_Stewie]

Originally Posted by MCT

3 years strong with my Wifebox 360. No silent treatment to speak of, ever. Although she does throw bichfits here and there, telling me "my disc isnt clean enough" when I know it is. But we get over that quickly and everything is back to normal.

.

Man of the house.

[proxpilot]

Originally Posted by robinandtami

I broke up with my PS3. She was kind of like a russian weightlifter. All power and no personality or social skills. She would never let me go to parties with all of my friends. Not many people would talk around her. It was like they had no mouths and ears. Her hands (the controllers) just never felt right in my hands. She was really great to take to movies though..... but even that came to a tragic end when she died a premature death. I could have replaced her with a second hand russian weight lifter for $150.... but I decided weightlifting wasn't my thing. Now her cold dead corpse lies in state in my guestroom, awaiting the day when I finally get around to trying to pry my Iron Man disc from her rigored grasp.

hahahah +1 my PS3 never lets me hangout or talk to my friends. the only thing she lets me do is text them. it's like i dont even have friends when im on my PS3!

[tommyboy81]

Originally Posted by proxpilot

hahahah +1 my PS3 never lets me hangout or talk to my friends. the only thing she lets me do is text them. it's like i dont even have friends when im on my PS3!

Psycho woman.

[Lord_Stewie]

currently both my wives (PS and 360 their names) bicker too much, even worse they have a who is louder contest all the time. The Sad thing I went bald dealing with both wives. so I don't recommend polygamy.

[doctorD]

I saw this over the weekend and thought it was very funny!

[EvolutionCherry]

[mikejet]

If anyone breaks up with anything then it should be the Wii. I hooked up with the Wii thinking it would be ready for a mature relationship. Found out it was a pedo and only liked playing with kids.

[HomeTheaterVirgin]

My xbox wife is weird she gets her red period once every 4 months

[Kyo28]

Funny piece indeed. Had a good laugh with it.

Coincidence has it that I just "broke up" with my 360 as well. It was a short and passionateless relationship ... we shared a good time with Blue Dragon and that was it.

Sold my Japanese 360 for 99 euro on e-bay. Lost about 150 euro on it but at least the 99 I recuperated, I can use to buy PS3 games and Blu-rays

[Sylin]

Originally Posted by mikejet

If anyone breaks up with anything then it should be the Wii. I hooked up with the Wii thinking it would be ready for a mature relationship. Found out it was a pedo and only liked playing with kids.

Not to mention no HD. The Wii needs glasses to see clearly.

[Hi-Def Steve]

I've been having a Ménage à trois for awhile now.

[Forrestandjen07]

I broke up with 360 a few months agao,

[Kyo28]

Originally Posted by Forrestandjen07

I broke up with 360 a few months agao,

We should start a club

[HomeTheaterVirgin]

I broke up with my 360 3 weeks ago,and went with a slim girlfriend for only $299.99.Im taking that %itch back and making up with my 360 you dont know a good thing untill its gone.