Scare Package (with The Last Drive-In!) comes to blu in October

[Han Solo 1977]

I just turned this off after the excruciating ‘The Night He Came Back Again Part 4’ or whatever it’s called. From the jump I was lost with this one. ‘Cold Opening’ was a confusing mess of meta overdrive, bad acting and what the hell am I watching?? ... type humor that pretty much set the template for the entire experience to follow. Everything here is just rushed to the max so there is no tension or scares. Just manic comedic horror violence that isn’t very funny or shocking and out of left field story developments that seem to be from the mind of a schizophrenic. Example: A guy down on his luck and under pressure from his wife joins a men’s support and self help group that actually turns out to be a pack of werewolves, only it turns out he knows this, so he kills them all then takes their hides home to his satanic cult member wife and they have a ceremony in their living room with the other cult members. Huh?? The video store segments were interminable. The three main characters seemed to be battling each other for the title of ‘most unlikabale’. The only thing I liked about this was the amazing slipcover and cover art, which nails that 1980’s VHS horror vibe. Too bad it belongs to this piece of crap movie.